The Fine Line Between Leading and Overstepping

This morning, I caught myself all worked up about something that really wasn’t any of my business. I was in my head with all the answers to a “problem” that I don’t think the other person involved even sees as a problem.

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It’s so none of my business that I’m not going to tell you the story. It's really just one of many that involves me ruminating about things that are completely outside of my control.

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Fortunately for me, people actually invite me to support them on something similar in their leadership.

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Since I’m quite experienced with having to identify what's mine to solve and what's not, I'm very good at helping my clients see when they’re losing an exhausting amount of time feeling stressed about someone else’s role and then helping them choose the most effective action plan.

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For example: a couple months ago, I was working with the CEO of a non-profit, let’s call him John, who was concerned about how his CFO was managing the budget. Because of the stress he was feeling, John had taken it upon himself to dig deep into the budget and find areas he thought they could track differently, and he was preparing to go share what he found with the CFO.

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I love John’s commitment to identifying problems and digging in to solve them. It's driven by wanting to help, loving a good challenge, and the satisfaction he feels when he finds a disconnect between the numbers. John is an engineer. Finding patterns and connections is basically his love language.

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I suggested that he press pause for a moment and consider the pros and cons of his approach.

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We had to tease them out, but here are some of the things that came up:

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PROS:

• It gets done fast - off his plate and off his mind
• John feels good about what he’s accomplished
• John gets to spend some time in his comfort zone - the tactics

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CONS:

• It takes away a growth opportunity for the CFO and it limits their ability to do their job, their way
• The CFO might feel frustrated, toes stepped on, undervalued*
• John doesn’t have as much time for the strategic and leadership sides of his role

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Bottom line is - as a leader, your job is to help someone perform their job at a higher level, not decide what that looks like and do their job for them.

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Leaders stepping in and taking over other people's work might not seem like a big deal. It super common and oftentimes exactly how work gets done in organizations.

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But it is a big deal if you’re a leader who wants to create a culture where you and your team can thrive.

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When you show up in a curious way or as a partner to your team, you empower them and help them learn and grow. You keep their responsibilities off your plate. And you stay in the strategic role you were hired for.

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Here is one simple question you can ask yourself to help you stay in your right role:

“What is my responsibility in this situation?”

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🤔 If the answer is nothing - stay out of it.

🤔 If the answer is accountability - work with the person whose responsibility it is.

🤔 If the answer is ownership - take care of it.

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The more you can align your focus, your energy, and your attention to the things that lie within your area of responsibility, the more effective your leadership will be and the less you’ll carry the stress of other people’s role.

Way easier said than done, but ditching the status quo and creating something better always is.

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Much Love,

Laura